The 5 Postpartum Gifts You *Really* Need

Over the years we’ve helped hundreds of new parents transition to life as a family. This tender, vulnerable time begs for help to ease exhaustion and overwhelm-—these gifts don’t come from a store or registry list! Sharing our five favs with your loved ones might motivate them to skip the toys and gadgets and extended visits and give your worn-out self something of real value.

Provide food.

New parents—especially breastfeeding parents—need lots of nutritious calories but have precious little time to cook. If home cooking is not an option, a food delivery service is a great alternative—particularly for loved ones who aren’t local. Coordinating a meal train divvies up the workload and lets lots of folks participate in feeding the family.

Validate all their feelings.

New parents have big feelings that can shift from positive to negative in a heartbeat. They are trying to process and recover from the most intense event of their lives while keeping their newborn alive and fed. Nonjudgmental listening, without adding your opinion or advice, is paramount. Let them emote freely—no talking them out of their feelings, trying to fix it or adding your two cents. This is not the time to share your own emotional history! It’s about *them*, not you. 

Help around the house.

Before baby is born, ask what domestic tasks will be most beneficial once baby arrives, and make a checklist of tasks available to share with other visitors. Doing laundry, taking out trash, feeding/walking pets, helping with siblings, vacuuming, running errands, tidying up the kitchen—completing such mundane yet essential chores can help new parents feel a sense of order during a very chaotic time. Remember: what *you* think might be helpful may not align with what *they* need, so it’s important to ask for specifics.

Hire our postpartum doula team.

New parents need efficient help with no emotional strings attached—a great reason to hire a professional postpartum doula. We offer nonjudgmental in-home support with compassion and skill—and we leave when our work is done.

Give them time and space.

New parents are exhausted and overwhelmed. The last thing they want to do is entertain visitors. Give them the space to be alone in the bed, with or without their baby, so that they can doze between feedings, get to know baby on their own terms, and begin to recover from this wondrous, crazy odyssey. Keep your interactions with them short and positive. There will be plenty of time in the coming months and years to share the joys of parenthood with them!

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